Rugby SuperMoms Help Support the Coach

by Andrea McKenna Brankin

"You are Not Alone, Really" - Coping with the Ups and Downs of Expat Life

When it comes to looking for women to write about that have had an impact me in Singapore, it’s so easy for me to know who that is: The Super Moms of my girl rugby players. 

I coach the Titans Trixies U14 girls team, which has about 13 girls on the team currently. As one of the only female coaches in our club, I seek out support wherever I can find it. And in the past few years that the girls have played on their own (not with the boys) I can honestly say I’ve found my tribe.

Most people know I live with Bipolar Disorder, a mood disorder of highs and lows that can affect everyday living. I have medication and medical support, but it’s nothing without having a supportive circle of friends who help me through the tough times. And the Rugby Super Moms have more than heeded the call.

They often check in with me via WhatApp to see how my weeks are going. And when it’s bad they check in more often or even meet up with me for coffee or lunch. Even that extra hug before or after our Sunday trainings means so much and helps me so much. It’s hard to describe the feeling, except to say that they really see ME. They see me struggle sometimes, or get too fired up, and they are there to bring back to baseline. 

But it’s not just mental health. The Rugby Super Moms help me in other ways. On a recent trip to Hong Kong with the team, I spent the first two days with a stomach bug. They checked on me, brought me water, grape gummy bears and nausea medication, as well as made sure I knew that the team was doing ok and wouldn’t need me for anything while I recovered. 

One thing I often get overwhelmed with is administration. I need a lot of help here. But each of the Rugby Super Moms stepped up with tour administration efforts, such as booking or changing flights, researching hotels and locations in Hong Kong for practice, dinner and took the girls to Hong Kong Disneyland. We even had an emergency McDonald’s run when our dinner restaurant caught fire! One of the really specials things that they did that made the tour extra-awesome was to get new uniforms with pink trim and logos, custom-made sweatshirts (Dad) and iron-on patches with tour logos for our tour t-shirts. 

[Now, one Rugby Super Dad did do a lot of tournament communication for the tour, and my husband, also a Super Rugby Dad, ran a practice while I was sick, so credit where credit is due. One Dad booked us a boat ride to see the skyline and also designed and ordered custom sweatshirts for the tour. But I’ll save more praise for them on Father’s Day!]

The most heartfelt support I get from the Rugby Super Moms is actually on the sidelines of the rugby games. They support my coaching, which I take very seriously, and they are there to bear witness to the successes and failures of our team. I believe, and so do they, that playing rugby is more than a sport; it teaches life lessons like determination, resilience, strength and humility. These are all lessons we moms have learned ourselves. And I’m still learning with the best rugby Moms in Singapore. 

Thank you Titans Trixies Super Moms! And Happy Mother’s Day. 

More SuperMoms

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​A mental health advocate and author of the book Bipolar Phoenix, Andrea runs the AWA Listen Ladies Group, providing confidential support for members at regular meetings. You can reach her at listenladies@awasingapore.org